WHY ARE YOU SO SCARED TO SHOW ME, TO SHOW ANYONE, WHO YOU ARE WHEN YOU’RE NOT PUTTING ON A FUCKING SHOW?
Oh Nancy, darling, baby!
Ain’t it obvious?
I mean, you already said it, kid!
It’s because I’m like a
Disco ball
Yeah, I’m a disco ball
I spin and give you all a party feeling
I’m sparkly and I’m fun,
And crucially I’m hung… from the ceiling
You’re far away from me
If you weren’t, well it would be
Such a pity
Cos when people get too close
Oof, baby, heaven knows
Well, it ain’t pretty
So I
Never let ‘em get too close
Never let ‘em stay too long
Or see me in the light
(The cold harsh light)
Gotta keep it all going
Gotta keep ‘em from knowing
What’s inside
So I spin
And I spin
And I spin
Dazzling like I’m a
Disco ball
And I stay
Far away
Up above
And you love it, I’m a
Disco ball
If I slowed,
Let you close,
You would notice
I’m nothing like you thought I was at all
But no one notices
(No!)
Cos everybody’s dancing round the
Disco ball
Watch me spin spin spin spin spin spin spin like I’m a
Disco ball
Watch me spin spin spin spin spin spin spin like I’m a
Disco ball
Yeah, I learned long ago
If I don’t put on a show,
Don’t keep that distance
(Nuh-oh)
People can, ya know:
“Disappointment!”
“Fag!”
“Homo!”
Just for instance
When I have let people in
There’s tended to have been
A bit of blowback
(Uh-oh)
Like:
“We can fuck, but I’m not gay”
“I wish you’d dress a different way!”
Ugh, such a throwback!
But - if I keep it all going
(Go)
If I keep it all glowing\t\t\t\t
(Glow)
It’s great for you and I\t\t
(For everyone)
Cos I never gotta show you
It really isn’t all
“Ooh ooh!”
Inside
So I spin
And I spin
And I spin
Dazzling like I’m a
Disco ball
So the me
That you see
Isn’t real?
No big deal - you love a
Disco ball
Cos when I spin spin spin in the glow
No one ever sees the cracks at all
No one notices
(No!)
Cos everybody’s dancing round the
Disco ball
Watch me spin spin spin spin spin spin spin like I’m a
Disco ball
Watch me spin spin spin spin spin spin spin like I’m a
Disco ball
Hey, is this thing on?
How’s it going, folks!
Thank you so much for coming out! …Ooh, if I had a penny for every time I heard that when I was fourteen…. I’d have no pennies!
So I’ve got this friend, let’s call her Nancy…cos that’s her name - and she’s all “why you gotta put on a show all the time? Maybe, you should be more vulnerable!” Well, kid, it ain’t gonna happen!
Cos when you grow up in - what’s it called? - oh, the world in which we live (you know, where you call each other gay in the playground and you don’t even know what it means but you just know it’s the WORST POSSIBLE INSULT? And every time you pop on the telly there’s a comedy where someone’s throwing up cos they didn’t realise the woman they were kissing is trans?), well, when you grow up in that world, you’re gonna kinda have it instilled into ya that queerness is about as embarrassing, disgusting, unnatural, immoral, and wrong as pineapple on a pizza!!!
And then if - one day, uh oh - you slowly start to suspect that that IS what you are, unchangeably, at your core —----- welllllll, you’re gonna learn to apply all those pesky little words... anyone?
(Embarrassing! Disgusting! Unnatural! Immoral Wrong!)
You’re gonna learn to apply them all to yourself, baby! And that is all before you give anyone else the chance!!
But it’s all good! It’s all groovy!! Cos you can just turn yourself into a little disco ball, baby! Cos, sure, no one wants to see the broken ugly pieces of a disco ball up close, but they don’t mind ‘em so much when they’re making the room sparkle!
So who cares why those guys would not be seen with me
Why noone wants the authentic me
Why those strangers threw that shit at me
Why the words hurt but deep down I don’t disagree
Why everyone I’ve loved’s ashamed of me
Why my parents wouldn’t look at me
Why it’s only dark inside of me
When I can disco ball it all away?
So I spin
And I twirl
To the world
All I am is a
Disco ball
So I’m fractured
And cracked?
That’s exactly
What attracts you to a
Disco ball
And though it’s fake
And the toll
That it takes
Kinda makes me think it’s not sustainable
It’s alright
Cos at least
For the night
They’ll keep dancing round the
Disco ball
So come on!
Here I am!
Come on, who’s gonna use me like a
Disco ball?
You can’t love
Me for me?
That’s okay!
You can love me like a
Disco ball!
And though I’m
Hanging on
By a thread
And any minute there’s a risk I’ll fall
Got no choice
Cos I know
I’m so much better off if I’m a
Disco ball
Hey someone
Prove me wrong?
How ‘bout you?
Say you wouldn’t choose the
Disco ball
Who’d prefer
All of this
Ugliness
To the “party woo-hoo”
Disco ball?
Not me!
That’s for sure!
You think you’re
Not a fan?
I’m really not a fan at all!!!!
So come on!
(Let’s go!)
Yes, everybody, dance around the
Disco ball!
Watch me spin spin spin spin spin spin spin like I’m a
Disco ball
Watch me spin spin spin spin spin like a stupid fucking
Disco ball
Watch me spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin spin SPIN SPIN SPIN LIKE A
DISCO BALL!!!!!!!!!!!!
